Week 3 Blog

Father-Infant Relationships

I find it interesting that there is a lot of information about bonding and attachment that refers to the mother but there is just a short little tidbit about father infant relationships. The paragraph describes that fathers spend less time a day caring for the infant but that a bond does form. They also talk about the way that fathers play with their children and how they take a more active approach. They are more involved in physical play than the mothers.

In my household I live with a young couple that have a ten month old baby and they share the task of caring for the baby pretty evenly. I do observe more physical play from the father; he becomes like a child himself. Chasing her around, playing peek-a-boo from behind the couch, and dancing and singing with her. Is this because mothers are more tired? Or motherhood brings a seriousness that can’t allow mothers to play like children anymore?

These days the roles of parents are changing more and more. I’m curious to know about bonding and non-traditional settings; including same sex couples households, father only households, grandparent households etc. What is the effect on children who don’t have fathers? Or who don’t engage in that kind of play with adults at a young age?

Week 2 Blog

A Sense of Self............

 

I found the “A Sense of Self” article to be the most fascinating out of all the materials. The article attributes both genes, and parenting styles as primary contributors to one’s personality. The adults that we are cared for by and surround us as children play a vital role in our lives.

 

I was born to a teen mom and raised by my maternal grandmother. My genetic composition and my environment was very similar to my biological mother. We were raised by the same woman in similar socioeconomic situations. There were some variables, time period, my grandmother’s age, me not being raised with my siblings as she was, etc. However, when I met my biological mother at the age of 15, I was in for a big shock. Not only did we look alike, we sounded similar, our mannerisms were similar, and our laugh is the same to a tee. We got along very well right from the beginning. (Although, for the first few years she was more like a big sister than a Mom.) Our similar environments and genetic pre-dispositions caused us to be very similar even without having ever met.

 

I think that it would be very interesting to learn more about parenting theories and research. Both my biological mother and I were raised by the same woman but she had become quite a bit more “relaxed” with age. I’m often told I got her during her best years. She used to make my Bio Mom out out to the yard to pick a “switch” when she got in trouble. I however, was only spanked a handful of times. I come from a big family of “spankers”. I often wonder what type of parent I will be. To spank, or not to spank? I wonder what type of psychological damages spanking does? If any? Are there consequences for the child for not spanking? What kind of punishments go too far? And is it really that easy to approach your child that’s having a meltdown in the middle of a public place and talk with them calmly about why they are angry?, as the article suggests.  (I think not)

Week 1 Blog

 
I found a great deal of interest in the "Life Course" perspective. This theory suggests how different life events such as biological, psychological, and sociocultural can have an effect on the life course. This theory discusses that there are three important dimensions,

 
1)    The individual timing of life events in relation to historical events.

 

For example, in my life, the economic impact of the war had made it very difficult for me to find employment that could provide a suitable living for me. However it did create a perfect opportunity in 2009 to begin attending college. The historical event of an economic downturn had an impact on that particular decision.

 
2)    The synchronization of individual transitions with collective familial ones.

 

In 2011 I was preparing to graduate from college. I began working but planned to continue with my education. However shorty before the completion of my program my mother passed away from lung cancer. I immediately put school on the back burner and decided just to work. I had to take care of my family and be able to be present for that process. That particular collective familial event changed my individual course.

 
3)    The impact of earlier life events as shaped by historical events, on subsequent ones.

 

On September 11, 2001 I was in my sophomore year of high school. I, like many others, sat and watched the horror of that day unfold and although I did not fully understand it. Two years later I joined the military. This “earlier life” event had impacted me enough to influence my choice to join the Army.

 

So as I evaluate this theory in my own life I can see the evidence of this theory and its accuracy. With times changing it’s fascinating to know how people's choices are changing. I am the first woman in my family not to have children before 25. The generation before me all have multiple children. They were raised in a different time than me. Not only that but they were raised by a different generation. If I had unlimited funds to research I would ask these questions. What does this say about my generation’s family values and how they are changing? Has my generation become selfish or more cautious? What is the impact of being childless? By waiting, are we more prepared to be parents? And what kind of impact will this have on our children in the future?